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The Yellow Dream

The Yellow Dream is my favorite nightmare. My dreams tend towards the cinematic, high-adrenaline blockbusters full of action and narrative and geography. Yellow Dream is abstract, a little art piece, three minutes and ten seconds on youtube.

When I was small, we had four bowls. They were made of plastic, lightweight and thin and so smooth that when you touched them, you expected to find oil on your fingertips. They were the precise yellow of powdered cheese. I have not seen any of them in years, since I was nine or ten. I remember them being in the playhouse, for a while, but it's a storage shed now, and nothing comes out. They're still here, somewhere. Nothing ever leaves.

The Yellow Dream takes place inside those bowls. There is nothing but dry oil and that yellow, all around me. I can feel it before I even fall asleep, against my knuckles and the backs of my eyelids and between my teeth. If I'm smart, I get up, move, escape and stay awake.

If I'm not, I see the threads. Just two, at first, trailing from above. Two threads, and they're crossed. Messy. Unacceptable. I lay them straight, and the world is right again, tidy and clean and bright.

But over there, four threads are knotted loosely together. They itch at me, pull at me, threaten to trap me. I lay them straight, and this place is perfect again, so clean and smooth.

Then a dozen. I begin to shake, I know what's coming. I lay them straight.

They don't stay straight.

They knot.

The world is wrong.

Then there are a hundred. A thousand. I try to lay them straight and my arms get caught in the knot, fingers twisted and tied, tourniquetted by the threads that escaped my control, that threaten to crush me.

I wake up, sweating and swearing in this house, this home that is not perfect and smooth and never will be. I lie back, force my breathing calm by counting stars. One, two, three, ten, twenty, forty-one. Above me is the tangle, waiting. My hands are tied.



This journal entry was written for LJ Idol: Week 2 Deconstruction. Constructive criticism is always welcome. LJIers, feel free to friend me or watch my LJ IDOL tag.  
Thank you for reading!

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Comments

( 14 comments — Leave a comment )
myrna_bird
Nov. 13th, 2010 07:20 pm (UTC)
Very vivid and interesting.
lioht
Nov. 13th, 2010 07:50 pm (UTC)
This is fantastic.
imafarmgirl
Nov. 13th, 2010 07:54 pm (UTC)
Very vivid. Everyone hates a dream like this especially if it comes again and again.
isis_lives
Nov. 14th, 2010 01:43 am (UTC)
You did a great job of using all of the senses.
the_vernacular
Nov. 14th, 2010 01:48 am (UTC)
I have dreams about weird objects, too! Like this couch my grandparents used to have, swallowing me. I think you did a great job of relating a pretty abstract dream; that is hard to do.
abangaku
Nov. 14th, 2010 03:49 pm (UTC)
I find it wonderful and scary that something this abstract can have so powerful an effect on you. It'd be my favorite nightmare too I think!
i_17bingo
Nov. 14th, 2010 05:30 pm (UTC)
This is dizzying (in a good way, of course)
drjeff
Nov. 14th, 2010 06:23 pm (UTC)
Wow, very nicely written and evocative. Loved this.
sweeny_todd
Nov. 15th, 2010 05:33 am (UTC)
strong imagery - I like it :-)
lawchicky
Nov. 15th, 2010 05:33 pm (UTC)
Oh gosh- I felt like I was in that dream with you.
rattsu
Nov. 15th, 2010 05:49 pm (UTC)
This is awesome!

Seriously, this is a wonderful post. I'm not sure why it connects so strongly to me, but oh hell, I got shivers down my spine.
team_jessie
Nov. 15th, 2010 07:08 pm (UTC)
Great job tackling a pretty abstract dream in written words! I feel like I can see it all.
joeymichaels
Nov. 16th, 2010 07:42 pm (UTC)
Aw, man, there are dreams we have all our life. So odd. Must be something that made a big impression on us somehow.
worldofcharlie
Nov. 16th, 2010 07:55 pm (UTC)
um...interesting...
( 14 comments — Leave a comment )